Dear Friend
~ Letters to Immanuel ~
Dear friend,
I dream of a humble cottage in the mountains where I can live the rest of my days with the love of my life and our beloved dog(s). All I yearn for is to be free from the prison of this material world, to live a simple and peaceful life. When I visited the Philippines, my motherland, in May 2025 I fell in love with the mountain villages of Benguet in the Cordillera Region up north. Up there amongst the sea of clouds, I planted the seeds of my “dream home” in my heart. I thought to myself, “I could live here...but what would I do for a living?”. So I went back to my life as a migrant in Australia determined to do what I need to do so that I can return to my homeland one day and settle there for good. When the time comes, I wish to die where I was born. But first, I must find a way to live without selling my soul. I need to change myself to live a purpose-driven life as a Christian grounded on humility, servitude to God, and love for others.
My soul-searching is manifested here through Bread + Cinema. This project places Christ (+) at the centre of everything I do. I pray that this spiritual and creative journey will lead me to that mountain retreat of my dreams where I can bake bread for loved ones, make art & film that nourish the soul, and become closer to God. My priest said, “God lives in the mountains”, and I believe this to be true. The mountains is where heaven and earth meet — I can't imagine a better place to call home.
24.07.26
Dear friend,
Today was my first day as an artisan baker. I woke up at 5am and drove through the fog and up the winding road to Springwood to start my shift at 6.30am before sunrise. Even though it was a cold winter’s day, the bakery was as warm and cosy as the people I worked with.
It’s a humble job being a baker – I did a lot of dishwashing and lifting heavy bags of flour. I made all kinds of dough and fillings, sliced sourdough bread and served customers with a smile. Even though it was only my first day, I felt like I belonged there because I felt Jesus with me. Russian painter Andrei Bodko has a series of modern icon paintings titled Always Near which depicts Jesus in the daily lives of ordinary people in the 21st century. One of the paintings that touched me was an icon of Christ, hands covered in flour, helping a baker make bread. That’s how I felt working in a bakery.
This job was a birthday gift from God – it marks my rebirth. I quit my full-time job last year because I wanted to purify my life and follow Christ. I made a vow of humility and poverty – putting all my faith in God’s provisions. I prayed for Him to lead me and to bless me with a vocation that will bring me closer to Heaven and away from this world. And my loving Father answered my prayer. He gave me a new life purpose – to give others their daily bread.
“Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and he will establish your plans.” (Proverbs 16:3)
10.06.26
Dear friend,
I needed a friend today and You were there beside me...at the park across St Patrick’s Cathedral during lunch, on the long train ride to Richmond, and in the car as I was driving home along Bells Line of Road. You were the sun that warmed my face on this cold winter day, the endless sky that gave me hope, the ground beneath my feet that kept me standing.
I am never alone. You never abandon me, Immanuel. To be loved by you is the greatest gift. You are my true friend – the only one I can trust. My heart belongs to You. I shall not fear.
“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” (Joshua 1:9)
Dear friend,
I needed a friend today and You were there beside me...at the park across St Patrick’s Cathedral during lunch, on the long train ride to Richmond, and in the car as I was driving home along Bells Line of Road. You were the sun that warmed my face on this cold winter day, the endless sky that gave me hope, the ground beneath my feet that kept me standing.
I am never alone. You never abandon me, Immanuel. To be loved by you is the greatest gift. You are my true friend – the only one I can trust. My heart belongs to You. I shall not fear.
“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” (Joshua 1:9)
29.05.26
Dear friend,
I saw a white deer today on the train ride home. I was looking out the window while passing through the bushland between Riverstone and Mulgrave, and there it was right before my eyes. It was so unexpected I didn’t get a moment to take a picture of it. It’s uncommon to see a deer in the Hawkesbury, let alone a white one – I didn’t even know they existed in Australia. In folklore and some spiritual traditions, the white deer symbolises purity and messages from the divine. Saints Eustace and Hubert both saw a vision of a crucifix hovering between a white stag's antlers, guiding their conversion to the Christian faith.
It is said that encountering a rare white deer in nature or in a dream is a blessing, an omen of spiritual awakening, and a call to embark on a new life journey. I saw a white deer today and whatever it means, I am grateful just to have seen such a majestic creature.
Dear friend,
I saw a white deer today on the train ride home. I was looking out the window while passing through the bushland between Riverstone and Mulgrave, and there it was right before my eyes. It was so unexpected I didn’t get a moment to take a picture of it. It’s uncommon to see a deer in the Hawkesbury, let alone a white one – I didn’t even know they existed in Australia. In folklore and some spiritual traditions, the white deer symbolises purity and messages from the divine. Saints Eustace and Hubert both saw a vision of a crucifix hovering between a white stag's antlers, guiding their conversion to the Christian faith.
It is said that encountering a rare white deer in nature or in a dream is a blessing, an omen of spiritual awakening, and a call to embark on a new life journey. I saw a white deer today and whatever it means, I am grateful just to have seen such a majestic creature.
05.05.26
Dear friend,
I saw a beautiful work of art on the theology of film that touched my soul. Isceljenje (The Healing) by Ivana Jovića and Monja Jovic follows an Orthodox Christian monk as he goes through a profound spiritual transformation. His struggle begins with his silent but arduous trek to reach a secluded hermitage. His peace is disturbed when a grandfather and his sick grandson appear at his doorstep – their presence opens up old wounds that torments the monk. The three souls are stuck, bound together by their painful past, crippled by the trauma of war. Forgiveness is the only way to ultimate healing – it is the cross that the monk carries throughout the film.
Isceljenje is a visually poetic and philosophical film that took me on a journey of spiritual transfiguration. The screenwriting is sublime. There is no dialogue in the first half hour of the film – silence speaks volumes and unravels the truths hidden behind the unsaid. The ethereal chanting of Byzantine singer Nektaria Karantzi uplifts the film into a prayer and the cinematography is a spiritual journey in and of itself. The scenography evokes a sense of poignant nostalgia. The weight of grief is palpable and the presence of God transcends the screen.
I felt healed after seeing the film and even more inspired to receive Your grace through the transcendental art of cinema.
Dear friend,
I saw a beautiful work of art on the theology of film that touched my soul. Isceljenje (The Healing) by Ivana Jovića and Monja Jovic follows an Orthodox Christian monk as he goes through a profound spiritual transformation. His struggle begins with his silent but arduous trek to reach a secluded hermitage. His peace is disturbed when a grandfather and his sick grandson appear at his doorstep – their presence opens up old wounds that torments the monk. The three souls are stuck, bound together by their painful past, crippled by the trauma of war. Forgiveness is the only way to ultimate healing – it is the cross that the monk carries throughout the film.
Isceljenje is a visually poetic and philosophical film that took me on a journey of spiritual transfiguration. The screenwriting is sublime. There is no dialogue in the first half hour of the film – silence speaks volumes and unravels the truths hidden behind the unsaid. The ethereal chanting of Byzantine singer Nektaria Karantzi uplifts the film into a prayer and the cinematography is a spiritual journey in and of itself. The scenography evokes a sense of poignant nostalgia. The weight of grief is palpable and the presence of God transcends the screen.
I felt healed after seeing the film and even more inspired to receive Your grace through the transcendental art of cinema.
25.04.26
Dear friend,
Today was a beautiful day for me and K. We went to the Northern Beaches and hiked up to the Barrenjoey Lighthouse. On the way down, we sat under a tree facing the sea and we talked and cried because of how much we love You. We made peace with the truth that with great love comes great pain. Before going home, we visited The Bible Garden – a little sanctuary tucked away in a quiet hilly street. The garden was enlivened by biblical plants, scriptures engraved on rocks, and bibles thoughtfully placed next to benches, and at the centre there was You (a wooden crucifix enrobed in vine leaves) standing before panoramic views of Palm beach, Broken Bay, Pittwater, and the Pacific Ocean. K and I sat there in peaceful reflection and afterwards, we hugged.
There was a plaque under an olive tree that tells the story of how the garden came to be. A devout Christian man named Gerald Hercules Robinson founded the Bible Garden in 1966, believing the land and the view from it to be “a perfect example of the glory of God’s creation.” Those words moved me as I read them. I felt like God was speaking to me in that moment like a Father giving words of wisdom to His daughter. I felt assured that I am on the right path. I am not alone in my search for beauty and meaning. He is with me, holding my hand.
If we truly open our eyes, we can see the mark of God’s hands everywhere...even in the most unexpected places.
Dear friend,
Today was a beautiful day for me and K. We went to the Northern Beaches and hiked up to the Barrenjoey Lighthouse. On the way down, we sat under a tree facing the sea and we talked and cried because of how much we love You. We made peace with the truth that with great love comes great pain. Before going home, we visited The Bible Garden – a little sanctuary tucked away in a quiet hilly street. The garden was enlivened by biblical plants, scriptures engraved on rocks, and bibles thoughtfully placed next to benches, and at the centre there was You (a wooden crucifix enrobed in vine leaves) standing before panoramic views of Palm beach, Broken Bay, Pittwater, and the Pacific Ocean. K and I sat there in peaceful reflection and afterwards, we hugged.
There was a plaque under an olive tree that tells the story of how the garden came to be. A devout Christian man named Gerald Hercules Robinson founded the Bible Garden in 1966, believing the land and the view from it to be “a perfect example of the glory of God’s creation.” Those words moved me as I read them. I felt like God was speaking to me in that moment like a Father giving words of wisdom to His daughter. I felt assured that I am on the right path. I am not alone in my search for beauty and meaning. He is with me, holding my hand.
“The heavens declare the glory of God; and the firmament sheweth his handiwork.” (Psalms 19:1)
If we truly open our eyes, we can see the mark of God’s hands everywhere...even in the most unexpected places.
02.04.26
Dear friend,
Let me tell you about this beautiful film I saw – Le Otto Montagne (2022) co-directed by Felix van Groeningen and Charlotte Vandermeersch, adapted from the novel The Eight Mountains by Paolo Cognetti. The film asks: “Who learns more? The one who travels around the eight mountains, or the one who stays and climbs to the top of the peak at the center?”...Does true wisdom come from wandering the world or deeply knowing one place?
Le Otto Montagne is a portrait of philia (brotherly love) painted on the canvas of the breathtaking Italian Alps. It’s a profound experience when a film can make you feel as if the writer and director have read your heart and the cinematographer has seen your dreams. I am drawn to these existential films... stories about the human condition, broken people, tragic relationships, and our longing to break free from the prison of our own choices. I can empathise with themes of loneliness, pain and grief even with no dialogue at all. Tragedy is familiar. It’s not happiness that I seek in cinema or in life but something deeper, more elusive. There must be some kind of meaning in all our suffering. To quote Viktor Frankl: “What is to give light must endure burning.”
A few years ago, a dear friend of mine gave me a copy of Sculpting In Time by Russian filmmaker Andrey Tarkovsky. That book opened my eyes to the world of films and awakened my soul to the concept of ‘cinema as prayer’. A quote from the book that deeply resonated with me was:
Tarkovsky’s films – Nostalghia, Stalker, The Mirror, Andrei Rublev – entered my life at a time when I was artistically burnt out and devoid of a spiritual life. His views on art and cinema lit a candle in my soul and for the past three years I’ve continued my pilgrimage into the theology of film. The more I learn about cinema, the more I fall in love with it. For me, the beauty of filmmaking is that it marries the Arts & Humanities to give birth to a masterpiece on screen. Every film that’s ever been made since the development of the Cinématographe by the Lumière brothers is a testament to the human spirit, creativity, and imagination.
Robert Bresson said:
Filmmaking is an intrument of the human spirit and cinema is a medium for divine connection. Everything that can be seen by the naked eye, captured by the camera, and projected onto the screen was created first by God. A faithful filmmaker is someone who devotes their lives to lifting up the divine hand of our Creator – the greatest Artist of all. Such sacrifice is indeed a selfless creative act.
In the words of Andrey Tarkovsky, “The aim of art is to prepare a person for death”. I aspire to become a faithful filmmaker, to make even just one meaningful film. Even if it’s the last artistic image I get to sculpt into being, I will see it through until the curtains fall.
Dear friend,
Let me tell you about this beautiful film I saw – Le Otto Montagne (2022) co-directed by Felix van Groeningen and Charlotte Vandermeersch, adapted from the novel The Eight Mountains by Paolo Cognetti. The film asks: “Who learns more? The one who travels around the eight mountains, or the one who stays and climbs to the top of the peak at the center?”...Does true wisdom come from wandering the world or deeply knowing one place?
Le Otto Montagne is a portrait of philia (brotherly love) painted on the canvas of the breathtaking Italian Alps. It’s a profound experience when a film can make you feel as if the writer and director have read your heart and the cinematographer has seen your dreams. I am drawn to these existential films... stories about the human condition, broken people, tragic relationships, and our longing to break free from the prison of our own choices. I can empathise with themes of loneliness, pain and grief even with no dialogue at all. Tragedy is familiar. It’s not happiness that I seek in cinema or in life but something deeper, more elusive. There must be some kind of meaning in all our suffering. To quote Viktor Frankl: “What is to give light must endure burning.”
A few years ago, a dear friend of mine gave me a copy of Sculpting In Time by Russian filmmaker Andrey Tarkovsky. That book opened my eyes to the world of films and awakened my soul to the concept of ‘cinema as prayer’. A quote from the book that deeply resonated with me was:
“Perhaps the meaning of all human activity lies in artistic consciousness, in the pointless and selfless creative act? Perhaps our capacity to create is evidence that we ourselves were created in the image and likeness of God?”
Tarkovsky’s films – Nostalghia, Stalker, The Mirror, Andrei Rublev – entered my life at a time when I was artistically burnt out and devoid of a spiritual life. His views on art and cinema lit a candle in my soul and for the past three years I’ve continued my pilgrimage into the theology of film. The more I learn about cinema, the more I fall in love with it. For me, the beauty of filmmaking is that it marries the Arts & Humanities to give birth to a masterpiece on screen. Every film that’s ever been made since the development of the Cinématographe by the Lumière brothers is a testament to the human spirit, creativity, and imagination.
Robert Bresson said:
“Your film – let people feel the soul and the heart there, but let it be made like a work of hands”.
Filmmaking is an intrument of the human spirit and cinema is a medium for divine connection. Everything that can be seen by the naked eye, captured by the camera, and projected onto the screen was created first by God. A faithful filmmaker is someone who devotes their lives to lifting up the divine hand of our Creator – the greatest Artist of all. Such sacrifice is indeed a selfless creative act.
In the words of Andrey Tarkovsky, “The aim of art is to prepare a person for death”. I aspire to become a faithful filmmaker, to make even just one meaningful film. Even if it’s the last artistic image I get to sculpt into being, I will see it through until the curtains fall.
28.03.26
Dear friend,
I often wonder what is it like to have children. How does it feel to create and shape a human being? I can only imagine...
There’s really only two kinds of people in life, isn’t it? A parent and a child. If you have children then you are a mother or a father. If you don’t, then you are still your parents’ child. I’m still just a kid even though I’m in my 40s. I’ve only conceived ideas. I’ve only been “pregnant with emotion”. I’ve only created art. Art is my baby – the source of my pain and inspiration, the reason I get out of bed in the morning and stay awake at night.
Saint John Chysostom said:
Not a day goes by that I don’t think about motherhood as Saint John described. Whenever I see babies and children with their mothers or fathers, my heart aches from wistful yearning. For now I can only be an artist – a sculptor of “lifeless images” – but I pray that my art could serve as a vessel for divine love.
Dear friend,
I often wonder what is it like to have children. How does it feel to create and shape a human being? I can only imagine...
There’s really only two kinds of people in life, isn’t it? A parent and a child. If you have children then you are a mother or a father. If you don’t, then you are still your parents’ child. I’m still just a kid even though I’m in my 40s. I’ve only conceived ideas. I’ve only been “pregnant with emotion”. I’ve only created art. Art is my baby – the source of my pain and inspiration, the reason I get out of bed in the morning and stay awake at night.
Saint John Chysostom said:
“To raise children and train them in virtue is the highest of all arts. Sculptor forms lifeless images but mother shapes a living person destined for eternity.”
Not a day goes by that I don’t think about motherhood as Saint John described. Whenever I see babies and children with their mothers or fathers, my heart aches from wistful yearning. For now I can only be an artist – a sculptor of “lifeless images” – but I pray that my art could serve as a vessel for divine love.
Immanuel - “God With Us”
“Behold, the virgin shall be with child, and bear a Son, and they shall call His name Immanuel.” - Matthew 1:22-23.
References
Publications:
Bresson, Robert. 2016. Notes on the Cinematograph. Translated by Jonathan Griffin. New York: New York Review Books.
Cognetti, Paolo. 2018. The Eight Mountains. Translated by Simon Carnell and Erica Segre, Atria Books.
Frankl, Viktor E. (Viktor Emil). 1962. Man's Search for Meaning : an Introduction to Logotherapy. Boston: Beacon Press.
Tarkovsky, Andrey. 1988. Sculpting in Time. Translated by Kitty Hunter-Blair. Austin, TX: University of Texas Press.
Films:
Isceljenje (The Healing). Directed by Ivana Jovića, Produkcija Terirem, 2014.
Le Otto Montagne (The Eight Mountains). Directed by Felix Van Groeninger and Charlotte Vandermeersch, Vision Distribution, Wildside, Rufus, Menuetto, Pyramide Productions. 2022.